Album Review 2: "Leisure" by Blur

Rating System: !!!! (buy or download this NOW) !!! (Grab a copy soon, or at least check out some of the songs) !! (Eh, youtube a couple tracks, maybe you'll like 'em) ! (Don't waste your time)

The reason I chose to review this album is because it is the album that a) most people are the least exposed to, and b) It sounds very little like their body of work. Therefore, for those of you who may love Blur but want to add to your collection, and for those of you who may have preconceived notions about their sound, keep reading.

For the record, Blur was a music powerhouse during the 90's, churning out a string of top 10 hits in England, and engaging in a (mostly) bloodless war with the ubiquitous Oasis. They are probably most well-known here in the states for their anthem "Song 2," which is commonly referred to as "woo hoo" or some variation. They are credited with being a pioneering force behind the Britpop movement, as well as exposing many listeners worldwide to England's middle-class culture, as opposed to Oasis' and others' focus on the struggles of the pub-scenes and working class (oy! oy!).

By the start of the 21st century, Blur had shifted from a Kinks-inspired pop act to somewhat of Radiohead Lite. However, before any of these movements, Blur released their debut album Leisure in 1991.

The best way to describe the music on this album is as a loose collection of quasi-baggy compositions. (Baggy being a formerly popular style of music in England that combined alternative rock with dance beats.)

The tracks on this album can essentially be divided into three categories: Fun, driving, and boring. This is not to say that certain categories don't overlap, but after giving this album a spin, you'll have a good sense of what I am talking about. Singer Damon Albarn (now probably known more from Gorillaz fame) drones his way through all 12 tracks, but his vocal malaise is rescued by the spirited guitar work of Graham Coxon and nauseatingly danceable beats laid down by drummer Dave Rowntree.

The tracks hang together nicely, as the lyrics seem to form a dreamlike cycle, reflecting the title. Nothing about the album is pulse-pounding, grabbing, or heart-wrenching. That is not to say the music has no value. Rather, the music is made to wash over the listener. It is not surprising that Albarn claimed the album to be "rubbish," as it is not nearly as deep musically lyrically or thematically as their other albums, but I feel as though poor Damon is being too hard on his own work.

Songs such as "Bad Day," "There's No Other Way," and "Bang" crackle with energy and an understated cool, but several of the other tracks manage to drain the energy from these songs and prove unwanted pace-setters, slowing the album to a crawl. Songs like the unfortunately titled "Repitition" and "Slow Down" play as their names would suggest---again, not to say they are bad songs, but they do take away from the mood and pace of the album.

It all depends on what you as the listener are looking for in an album. As a serious work, as a driving companion, this albukm fails. However, Leisure does provide a few nice tracks for use at parties or dances. For fans of bands such as the Jesus and Mary Chain, The Happy Mondays, or early Stone Roses recordings will find in this album a warm reminder of an earlier era in music, when various regions formed musical identities for themselves, and people rode mopeds. Ultimately, there will most likely be 2 or 3 tracks that will recieve multiple plays, with the rest being skipped until they are eventually deleted from your library.

This album receives a rating of : !! 1/2


Top tracks:

"Bang" --As the title would suggest this one is short and sweet. Apparantly written in 15 minutes at the request of record execs clammoring for another sure-single, Blur rushed to the studio to record it. However, as it stands today, "Bang" is a fun, catchy song, featuring a memorable drum line, and solid harmonies.

"Bad Day"--One of the most upbeat songs about misfortune, this is probably the strongest track on the album, featuring a touch of psychedelia (in its use of organs and wah-pedals), a healthy dose of dancebeats, and a catchy guitar riff, the song marches forward like a train on acid, twisting and turning in on itself, spewing tight harmonies and wah-fueled solos. Even our friend the accordion is put to good use, featured as a solo player for the song's intro.

"There's No Other Way"--Blur's first single, and possibly the catchiest song on the album. From the Beatle-esque "ahhhhs" on the chorus, to the dancehall feel, to the swirling organ, this song seems to capture Blur at their most "baggy" and certainly most unrefined. However, this is a great party track, and is probably the song I would say most represents the album.


* Note: the song "Sing" from this album was noted by Coldplay's Chris Martin as the source and inspiration for band's most recent album.


Again, I'm taking requests for albums and bands, so send me some you like, dislike, or would like another opinion of.

Peace Love and Understanding

Album Review 1: "Young Forever" by Aberfeldy

If someone were to have a discussion about where the best bands in the world hail from, undoubtedly the mobius-strip of America vs. England would unfold.

However, if someone were to begin discussing where some of the most INTERESTING bands came from, and that is interesting without the artsy-pretention of Iceland, or the techno ramblings of France, I would say that Scotland would be a solid pick. Scotland has quietly developed the likes of 80's staple Simple Minds, indie heroes The Jesus and Mary Chain, Mogwai, Teenage Fanclub, and Britrock champions Travis and Primal Scream. Today, they boast the infectiously irreverant Fratellis, among others.

However, one band that quietly has made a name for itself among college radio stations, the bottom corner of rock magazines, and sell-out shows at off the beaten path venues, is the band Aberfeldy, masterminded by singer-songwriter Riley Briggs.

Their debut album, "Young Forever" (2004) is not simply a fun album. It is not simply an enjoyable album. It is an album gauranteed to make you so happy, after one listen you will run out into the streets yelling for your friends to buy a copy themselves. It is the type of album that if listened to in every inner-city, every back alley of Fallujah, and every Somali ghetto, would end violence and hatred as we know it. Well, okay, this may be a tad hyperbolic, but "Young Forever" does bubble with such a tangible sense of happiness and possibility, that you cannot help but smile as you listen to it.

Twee without being sickeningly adorable, Aberfeldy writes vignettes of modern fancy, crafting slices of life and vivid dreamworlds about everything from eccentric old men (Tom Weir) to the fantasy of traveling to an alien world (Heliopolis by Night). Briggs' voice bounces between lovelorn ache on the plaintive "Vegetarian Restaurant" to the aww-shucks twinkle-eyes croon of "Summer's Gone."

Are the songs light? Yes. However, behind that light bounce often lies some delightful wordplay and emotional depth. Recorded in a single room, Aberfeldy clearly operates as a cohesive unit, trotting out strings, accordion, and essentially every auxillery percussion instrument one could hope to find in their high school band room. However, what puts the band's sound over the top is the contribution of Vicky Gray, who provides spot-on harmonies on the album's strongest tracks (although it could be argued that this is WHY the tracks are so strong). The key is that each song has its own identity, yet the album has a sense of cohesion, feeling like a unified work rather than a jumble of recordings.

The bottom line is that "Young Forever" is an album that harkens back to an era when music was made to be simply enjoyable; art for the inclusive, when lyrics were both intelligent and tailor-made for sing alongs. Briggs and his bandmates are clearly having a good time on this album, and it shines through with each listen.


Top tracks:

"A Friend Like You"-- The album's opener, which begins with the lines "I love everyone/everybody underneath the sun/I think you're all the most amazing fun." This essentially sets the tone for the album. The song is catchy, but warrants further listenings before its full value is clear. Briggs offers an upbeat ditty underscored by bittersweet vocals, laying an emotional anchor that helps keep the light content from sailing away into the wind of a summer evening.

"Tom Weir"-- A dynamic portrait of a man known as the "king of the anoraks," who discusses history with the birds around his house. Briggs arrangement and vocal expression celebrate this man who is a heavy drinker, poor dresser, and gadabout. One cannot help but smile, or at the very least bob their head compulsively while listening to this song

"Helipolis by Night"-- Without a doubt the best song on the album, it tells the story of one man's journey to the mystical land of Heliopolis, only to return to the safety of his bed by the end of the song. This song is impossibly catchy, and it will manage to burrow into areas of your memory you thought were reserved for traumatic childhood memories and internet passwords. A gem of a song, that if released 10 years earlier would have been a smash hit across college campuses and folk festivals.


That is all for now friends. Remember, I am taking your requests for album reviews. Which one is next? Stay tuned!

Peace love and understanding

-- J. Flash

Shift in Focus: Album Reviews!

So, I decided to mix things up a bit in this blog. Mostly I have been blogging about epic tales of mediocrity, listing things, posting handbooks, guides, and bizarre observations. However, for the next few weeks, I am going to completely shift my focus to reviewing music.

Music critique has always been one of my great joys in life, so not only will I be attempting to take an honest look at albums you may know, love, or hate, I would love to eventually have exposed or introduced all of my readers to at least one new band or artist they may not have known, as well as offer a fresh perspective on that band.

So, look for these reviews over the next few weeks!

Oh, I will also be taking requests for albums to review, especially bands or albums you think I would especially enjoy or hate!

Peace Love and Understanding,

J. Flash

This Movie Could Use More "Bad to the Bone"

We have all seen movie trailers. They play before the real movies we pay to see. The goal of these trailers is to try to generate excitement about the upcoming movie. Therefore, what the producers do, is put together a compilation of clips that appear in the film, in a way that makes it look cool. Dramas will feature slow, powerful images. Thrillers will use quick cuts and fast-paced dialogue. And comedies will use all the lines that will ultimately be memorized and regurgitated by 13-year olds nationwide before the movie even comes out, so when you finally do see the movie, those lines will no longer be funny, nor even amusing.

However, the most important element of a film trailer is the use of music. There are three classic go-to songs for lazy, and embarassingly lame producers to use in their trailers. The first, is "I feel good" by James Brown, usually used for a madcap sports comedy, or something where old people act young, white men act "black" or kids do something wacky, possibly on a ragtag baseball team.

The second is "born to be wild" by Steppenwolf, often used in trailers about a group of 15-year olds who somehow manage to outsmart a group of trained Washington law enforcement officers, or movies featuring old ladies riding their motor scooters around town, in a weak attempt on the part of the producer to be "ironic."

But, the grand champion of crappy trailer music is....well if you read the title you would already know, it's "Bad to the Bone" by George Thorogood. Thorogood is one of the great bluesmen of our time. He had sold millions of records, played countless shows, and is still a major draw at county fairs, casinos, and anywhere else where middle-age tough guys with mustaches and denim vests gather. But no matter what Thorogood has done or will do in his career, there will be four words on his tombstone: “Bad To The Bone.” Ever since Thorogood released the song on his 1982 album of the same, “Bad To The Bone”—and its instantly recognizable, cartoonishly bluesy riff—has had a steady home in pop culture, where it remains an easy cue for lazy filmmakers and advertisers looking to convey bad to the bone-ness.

According to IMDB.com, “Bad To The Bone” first appeared in John Carpenter's killer car movie Christine in 1983. Ever since then it has shown up in more than a dozen movies and TV shows, including Talk Radio, Problem Child, Problem Child 2, Terminator 2, The Parent Trap, 3000 Miles to Graceland, Joe Dirt, and North Country. Perhaps the most notable usage of “Bad To The Bone” is in the Problem Child movies, which uses the riff as a recurring motif accentuating Junior’s various acts of hilarious mayhem. To this day, many people believe that Thorogood wrote the song about a lil' redheaded asshole. (This appears to be false.)

There is a formula to using this song, so try to follow along.

The announcer will say something like:

"Country Village is a quiet, peaceful town...the residents are used to peace and quiet, friendly games of golf, and relaxing cookouts. Until...HE arrived..."

Then the camera will start at the character's feet, so you can't quite tell how intimidatingly huge they might possibly be. Then "Bad to the Bone" kicks in. So now the viewer is like "o wow, some tough guy must be coming to town!"

Then the camera pans upward, revealing NO WAY, it's actually a little kid, a scrawny redneck, Jim Carrey in a Hawaiian shirt, or some combination of these things. Then the audience goes, "Oh, haha it turns out the person is NOT really intimidating, so it's really funny that they used that song to go along with it, haha that's ironic, LOL!" It also helps if that little kid, redneck or Carrey is wearing sunglasses or a leather jacket.

There’s a lot of competition for most “on the nose” use of “Bad To The Bone”—it’s pretty much impossible to be subtle or clever with a song so awesomely ridiculous—but if only one filmmaker can take home the “Bad To The Bone” obviousness award, then it has to be James Cameron, who used the song in Terminator 2 for an early scene where Arnold Schwarzenegger beats up some bikers for their leather gear. Wow, a scene with motorcycles and a badass action hero set to “Bad To The Bone”? Fantastic.

You'll notice that this note did not attempt to list any information about myself or anyone else. Nor did I ask you to provide that information. And that my friends, is bad to the bone.


Peace Love and Understanding

Scientific Explantations for Jerkweed Behavior

This post is aimed for the men out there, as the ratio of jerks, in terms of men to women is about 387:1.

Therefore, what I am attempting to do, is to break down Jerks, Douchebags, and Assholes into various categories. Read them over, and see if you can identify anyone you may know who fits that description.

Then, for your education, I have provided a scientific explanation to help justify this socially-obnoxious behavior.

Therefore,

There are men whose very appearance can compel you to turn your head in disgust, muttering the word "douche" in a long whisper. They're flexing in their skin-tight t-shirt, invading women's personal space at the bar and going on and on about their goddamn promotion.

For all the times you've muttered, "What's the deal with that douchebag?" science has actually taken the time to answer what was probably a rhetorical question.

To start:

1. The Egocentric Douchebag:

The child who screams "Look at me! Look at me!" is all grown up and he can't wait to tell you about himself. You want to talk about the football game last night? He'll talk about how he quarterbacked his high school football team to the state championships. Wondering about a good place to grab a bite to eat? He'll tell you he can make reservations anywhere because he's the man. Concerned about poverty in Africa? Why the hell do you care! This dude has banged like twenty models! Seriously, you're talking to a legend, and he'll be the first to remind you of this fact. This jerkweed can often be found slouching in the back of one of your classes, yelling stuff out and laughing to himself. He may also be found obnoxiously pretending to be drunk at parties so he can "get away" with groping, fondling, and other lewd and grimy behavior.

Scientific Explanation:

Histrionic Personality Disorder or HDP. The disorder is characterized as an overwhelming desire to be noticed and willingness to engage in any attention-seeking behavior. This was the kid who was the first to jump off the high dive--if there was an audience to watch him.

These drama-queens know all the world's a stage, and they have been cast for lead role in William Jerkspeare's "MacD'bag." Those with HDP have a self-esteem that is dependent on the approval of others and they posses no clear concept of self worth. They're way more likely to lash out at criticism or disapproval than they should be. They'll flirt with anyone, any time. They tend to mistake any attention as sexual attraction ("I'm tellin' ya, she totally wants me, bro"). This usually comes in the form of a waitress or any working female with whom they may encounter during the course of their day. Their opinions are easily influenced by others, and they find it difficult to support them if pressed for details. They travel in packs, usually other assholes who they dually want to impress and one-up.

2. The Weightlifting Douchebag:

The only thing this man loves more than his own reflection is sleeveless t-shirts. Sure, we all wouldn't mind toning up or putting on some muscle, but this guy's artificially tanned muscles are his full-time job. After hearing the guy go on about it for 20 minutes or so, we don't feel so bad for putting a video game controller in our hands and watching our body turn to dough.

It's really fantastic that this guy constantly offers to "show you my way of doing these lifts" or that he has perhaps the world's worst tattoo on his bicep, probably of a poorly doodled cross or the chinese symbol that he believes to mean "perfection" that actually means "various types of eagles" or "heyena bootyhole." It's also quite impressive how he is able to constantly walk as if he has three rods up his ass with rods up their asses, and his shoulders held together with staples.

Scientific Explanation:

Muscle Dysmorphia or what is commonly referred to as "Bigorexia". Researches believe that the roots of both self-perception disorders come in early adolescences. While girls are dreaming of lounging poolside in Barbie's dream house, men want to be tearing down Cobra's infantry as a G.I. Joe.

Seeing the sculpted action figures sets up an unattainable goal for some young men. They carry the notion of always being too "small" and "thin" into their adult years, after they've become rippling man-beasts. Let's all take a minute to thank the parents of these impressionable youths for going Joe instead of Ninja Turtles, or our society may presently be plagued with mutant reptilian half-breeds roaming the sewers. Back in 2000, researchers discovered an alarming number of men who abstained from sex with their wives in order to focus all their energy on working out. Strange.

3. The Obnoxious Drunk Jerkweed:

Much like the egomaniac, this guy is all about drawing attention to how crazy he is, and OMG he's so wasted, and whatever, deal with it, let's hug...

This heavy-drinking ass stumbles around parties, slobbering on strangers and telling people how buzzed he is... after two beers. Later in the night, after he's polished off his second six-pack, he'll tell you he's cool to drive home, just after he finishes pissing on your living room couch. This guy never seems to know where he's at on the sobriety scale, although on the douche scale he's always a perfect 10.

Scientific Explanation:

This guy displays signs of what is known as the Mallenby effect. Basically, this causes a person to overestimate the effects of alcohol during the first few drinks (called the "absorption phase" by people who study drunkenness) and will underestimate them later in the night (during the "elimination phase"). If you want to see this concept in action, buy a lot of nonalcoholic beer for a party full of teenagers. If drinking with teens isn't your thing (and legally it shouldn't be anyone's "thing") then check out most college frat parties where the masses will start screaming "WHOO!!!" within the first 15 minutes that the keg is tapped, long before their system has actually had the chance to absorb any alcohol into the blood stream. Later, the same people will physically display all signs of being drunk, but will claim to be sharp as a tack, because, as they'll tell you, they drink so much that it, like, would totally take all the booze in this place to get them drunk. Then they'll plow their Mustang into a drainage ditch and take a swing at a cop.

4. The Angry, Raging Asshole:

Don't step on his shoes, don't make incidental eye contact and don't talk to his girlfriend. If he doesn't have a girlfriend, don't talk to any girls because they could be his girlfriend, someday. It doesn't take a whole lot to set this type of guy off, and after he's pissed, screaming and swinging you'll wish you'd actually done something worthy of such a tantrum.

He's easy to pick out in a crowd, there'll be one man yelling while everyone else in the crowd exchanges confused glances along with sympathetic shrugging shoulders. He's the screaming one, the one trying to finish an imaginary fight with a person who didn't start it. A douche that can't be ignored. He may have a little mustache, if he is a trashy douche. He may have a lot of hair gel also. Generally this guy will be pretty thin and scrawny, or really fat and look like the guy in that one commercial for Dave and Buster's.

Scientific Explanation:

This is a classic case of Intermittent Explosive Disorder or IED. This guy is a time bomb, and nobody can see the timer but him--he can go off at any moment. Although his aggression normally isn't life threatening, it's really fucking irritating. Medically diagnosed IED is defined as a behavioral disorder characterized by repeated episodes of aggressive and violent outbursts grossly out of proportion to the situation. Wearing a sleeveless rayon body vest while stinking like Axe body spray is common but unfortunately correlation does not equal causation.

A 2006 study by the National Institute of Mental Health has determined the condition to be more prevalent than previously thought, affecting around 2 out of every 25 adult Americans, most commonly seen in male youths. How the researches went about collecting data is not disclosed, though we hope they ruined many a striped shirt on nickel-beer-night while gathering subjects' reactions.

5. The Aging Jerkweed:

It seems no matter where you go there's a grumpy asshole making things awkward for everybody. He'll bitch about why his coupons aren't scanning at the checkout. He'll complain when someone has an accent while in America. And that goddamn hip-hop is always too loud! He won't hesitate to tell you about how much better things were in the past, before the whole world turned against him.

Scientific Explanation:

This man is suffering from what is known as andropause or "male menopause." It's a frustrated state accompanied by anxiety and anger resulting from a lack of testosterone, the production of which diminishes in midlife. The term "male menopause" can also be used as an early detection method, since most men with IMS will hear this term and respond with a loud grunt while shouting about "New Age psychobabble bullshit."

The onset of this disorder is common at ages 40 to 55 but may happen as early as 35 or as late as 65. Although, a definite age is difficult to pinpoint if the male in question has been a prick their whole life.

The development of IMS is also dependent on environmental factors associated with stress, such as uncertain financial security, strained personal relationships and whatever happens to be wrong with kids these days. The physical symptoms (which can include loss of sex drive, loss of physical strength and increase in body fat) only exasperate the sense of frustration and nervousness and increases behaviors that society classifies as douchebaggery.

There are free tests and screenings available online to check for IMS, but if you already have it, you probably think the internet is a waste of time for freaks and perverts.

Peace Love and Understanding